im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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