Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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