Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize