OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
