If that was your dad, he is hot
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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