So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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