I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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