Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize