We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
