i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
one two three fourrrrnication!
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Be still, my beating vagina.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
