is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
