My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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