She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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