so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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