Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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