Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
