well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
