in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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