in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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