Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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