On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
