I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
