Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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