i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
