How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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