they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize