WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize