The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
