this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I'm always down for nudity.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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