worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
soo... how was my night?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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