No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
dude i'm inner monologue high
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
