I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
