Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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