You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
