I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Less talking, more tequila
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
