You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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