Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize
