Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
