Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
