when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Randomize
