problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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