If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
