whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
