Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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