So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
