Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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