Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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