I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
