Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Welp...herpes.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
