real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
