tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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